How To Overcome Suffering?

Depression and low self-esteem is a form of suffering. We will be craving for worldly success, spiritual achievements, social status, appreciations and recognitions, love and attention, beautiful appearance and attractive personality, and wanting to achieve all our desires and being able to do what we like to do in order to give us the feeling of success, happiness and confidence.

Even though we are very successful in life and have done whatever we wanted to do in life, we will still be discontent and feel meaningless if we attached to the worldly achievements and happiness to make us feel good about ourselves and our life. Even if we attached to spiritual achievements in order to make us feel meaningful and feel good will also bring us suffering. It is because all these will change and disappear.

Our self-worth needs to hold on to certain thing or faith to makes us feel good and happy or feel meaningful in life. This is very normal. There is absolute nothing wrong with this. But what will happen to us if this thing is not available to us anymore or if the faith that we hold on to is not there anymore? We will collapse, unhappy, depress and feel meaningless.

It is because there is an attachment there. We are attached to something that is perishable and not real in order to give us happiness and to have a sense of self-worth or a meaningful life.

If we really want to transcend suffering, we need to learn how to become independent without attaching to anything at all in this world of perception to make us feel full, valuable, content and meaningful.

We don’t need to do anything to show to anyone and to prove to anybody that we are good or we have value. We don’t need to feel that we are being needed by someone to have a sense of self-worth and give us some meaning in life.

We don’t even need to crave for love from anybody but can give pure love (no lust and passion) without identification and expectation because we are the love itself if we realized the Truth. When we stop identity ourselves with the body, the mind, the ego, the intellect, the senses and our life, we are not different and not separated from the nature – the earth, the sun, the wind, the water and the space. The nature allows every living beings and everything to be in it and utilize it resources for the need to be exist. It gives without beginning and without ending. Its power is unlimited and unconditioned. There is no differentiation of likes and dislikes, birth and death, happiness and unhappiness, good people and bad people, good happenings and bad happenings, animals and human beings, beautiful and ugliness or cleanliness and dirtiness. There is no duality – everything is same, no differences and no special privileges. The nature accepts everything as it is, not controlling anything and has no intention at all. The nature has no attachment to its actions or it impermanent condition or the consequences of its actions. It has no selfishness, no jealousy, no anger, no hatred, no differentiation, no ego, no pride, no happiness, no unhappiness… it has no qualities at all. Everything is just being what they are. There is no past. There is no future.

If we realized this, there are no more fears, worries, conflicts, cravings and aversions, likes and dislikes, suffering and happiness. We are full, content, and immovable. This peacefulness and contentment is not achieved by acquiring anything from outside, but by letting go of everything, not controlling anything out there but having firm self-control of our own thoughts, actions and speech. Our own self is the only thing that we can have control of and will give us peace of mind if the thoughts, actions and speech are being well controlled. If we try to control anything other than our own thoughts, actions and speech, we will be in trouble and suffering. We will be creating problems for ourselves.

We cannot control the changes in our body and outside our body – the breathing, the heart beat, the sensations that arise and pass away unceasingly when the senses get contact with the objects, the law of nature, the karma of the living beings and the world, and how other people think, feel, act and speak. The one thing that we can do is let them be and let things are. And then we will not generate any problems or conflicts and unhappiness for ourselves and other people.

We cannot stop the thoughts and feelings that crop up unceasingly in our mind, but we can stay detached, not identify ourselves with it. And then let it disappear by itself naturally. Not trying to reject uncomfortable feelings or hold on to comfortable feelings. Just be aware of their existence but give no value to them. Not to categorize them into ‘good’ and ‘bad’, ‘comfortable’ and ‘uncomfortable’, and not generate likes and dislikes, craving and aversion, and also no need to react to them.

By bringing the awareness focusing on the breath without trying to control the breath or change anything, and be at the present moment at all time, will help us to detach from any feelings and sensations that arise in our body and mind. Whenever we find that our awareness has wonders away to the thoughts or the feelings, without feeling frustrate, very gentle we bring the awareness back to the breathing, back to the present moment, on what we are doing now and where we are now. By keep doing this, we will find that actually there are no problems troubling us now, and there are no past memories and future imaginations that can disturb us, disturb our tranquility and peacefulness.

The outgoing tendency of the mind will make us feel curious and anxious about the things outside. It wants to know, to see, to hear, to smell, to taste, to think and to feel about everything. It will continue to pull our attention away from what we are doing and where we are now at the moment. We should not struggle with it and patiently we bring the awareness back to what we are doing now. Slowly this exercise or training will become a habit and it doesn’t request much effort to stay at the present moment. This is what gives us calmness. But even this state of calmness we also cannot attach to, because this state of peacefulness will change also. If we attached to the state of calmness, we will be very unhappy when this state of calmness is being disturbed or disappeared.

If we can let go the state of disturbance by thoughts and feelings, and let go of the state of calmness as well, and then we will be at a state of real peacefulness and bliss. We don’t need anything to give us the meaning of life, the sense of self-worth or confidence. We are what we are. I am what I am.

It doesn’t matter at all with how other people think of us, do to us, or say to us. There is no praise or censure that can affect us or influence us. There is no need to have judgment, criticism, comparison and competition with other people or with our own self. We don’t need to challenge ourselves to do anything or to achieve anything. We don’t need to prove to ourselves or to other people.

We need to have a faith to hold on to. Or else we will be drifting all the time in search for something that will give us meanings in life and give us the value of ourselves and our existence in this world. But this faith should be something real and imperishable. Then only this faith will be really firm and everlasting in our heart no matters what is happening in our life and when there are changes occur in our body and the mind. And we will not be disappointed because this faith that we rely on will not change or disappear.

If we depend on something that will change to be happy and to have sense of self-worth, and are attached strongly to that happiness and sense of self-worth, but when this dependence is being taken away by impermanence, we will be lost in disappointment and unhappiness. Such like, many people’s faith or happiness is built on material enjoyment, accumulation of wealth, sensual pleasure enjoyments, having fame and popularity, being loved and liked by others, having strong and healthy body, intelligence and achievements in education, success in business or career, having good family ties, good relationship and friendship, and having a strong religion belief or spiritual practice under certain belief or teacher.

But all these are conditioned by our perception and impermanence, and will go through changes as time goes by and is unsatisfying in it essence. We cannot be content anyhow if we rely on these impermanent objects to give us satisfactory and meanings.

As a Yoga teacher, we are doing something very meaningful thing in life sharing Yoga with others and helping many people to come out from suffering, but we really need to remain detached from our fruit of action. It is not that we deny ourselves or being hard on ourselves, but it is the only reality that will free us from unhappiness and suffering.

If we will feel good and happy about ourselves and our lives when the students have learnt something from us and they are grateful and will take Yoga practice more seriously from now on, this means we are still being conditioned by this attachment towards the fruit of our actions. It is a good thing when the students get benefited after taking lessons from us. And there is nothing wrong at all to feel great about that. But we should stay detached from all these as well. Then we will be okay and will not be caught up in the fruit of our action.

When the students start to decline in their practice or they criticize about our classes and didn’t have faith in our teaching, or they encounter difficulty in Yoga practice and hurt themselves during taking classes under us, this is going to make us feel bad about ourselves and be depress if we are still attached to the fruit of our actions. And then it will further on destroy our faith in Yoga, and destroy our sense of value in ourselves and in life.

Of course we should be responsible for our presentation and teaching. If we are not experience enough or made some mistakes or being careless, we should be responsible for the consequences that arise and should make some corrections to improve ourselves.

But the real lesson is not about this.

It is about our self-worth should not be depending on happiness that comes from any type of success and achievements in any fields, or depending on compliments and appreciations from anybody.

If we think that our life is so meaningful and are happy because we feel that we had helped somebody and doing something really good, then very soon we will be losing this feeling of meaningfulness and happiness when we receive some bad feedback from the students or when we are not able to share Yoga with others anymore due to unavoidable reason.

Unless we are not attached to any of these things at all, then we will not be affected by all the good and bad results that come from our actions.

That is real detachment and free from unhappiness.

True happiness is not the happy feelings that we feel when something good is happening or when our wishes come true. This happiness will come to an end and disappear after some times, and we will be unhappy and feel meaningless when this feeling of happiness is gone.

If we need to do something good to make us feel meaningful and we will feel meaningless if we are not doing those actions, then we are being bound by this dependence and caught up in dissatisfaction and unhappiness.

It is like our Prana is being influenced by the food that we consume and by the body movement that we are in – such like in Yoga Asana. The position of the body is influencing the Prana, and this Prana is influencing our mind and feelings. There is nothing wrong to eat good food to make us feel happier and calmer. There is nothing wrong to practice Yoga Asana to make us feel good and relaxed. But Yoga teaches us to go beyond both good and bad feeling, go beyond the energy, not rejecting bad sensations and bad feelings, and not craving for good sensations and good feelings too. The energy influences the body and mind, but we are not the body or the mind. We (will power) are stronger than the body and the mind. And if we do not identify with the body and the mind, we can transcend suffering and not affected by any energies and impermanence. Because energy and impermanence only affect the body and the mind, but it cannot affect the Self (our true self).

Or else we will feel good, only if we eat good food and doing Asana. But we will feel bad if good food is not available to us and we are not doing any Asana practice.

Become totally selfless and independent from everything in this world of perception of the senses, detached from the fruit of our actions, which will bring us peace of mind and steadiness in our faith that will gives us true happiness and real meaning of life – eternal and imperishable bliss, fulfillment and contentment.

The meaning of life is not by depending on something that we do or not do, or depending on the feeling of self-worth and happiness that arise from what we do, what we have and what we experienced, but by realizing our true nature and be free from our egoistic dissatisfying mind and the binding karma that arise from our thoughts, actions and speech.

If we depend on someone’s love and affection, this will change.

If we depend on our good feelings, this will change.

If we depend on our strength, youthfulness, attractiveness, beauty and good health of the physical body, all these will change.

If we depend on our teacher, our parents, our partner, our children, and our family and friends, all these will change.

If we depend on success, achievements, intelligence, worldly knowledge and good memory, all these will change.

If we depend on anything at all that is conditioned by this body and the mind, the senses and all the objects in this worldly life, everything will change.

So, what is the real thing that will not change?

It is our true Self. It is the only real existence – no birth and no death, no beginning and no end, no good and no bad, unconditioned, independent, free from impurities and elements. It is full and whole, pure existence, pure knowledge and pure bliss.

Let us stop identify with our impermanent physical body and the ever changing mind. We are not this body, we are not this mind. This body is not ours, this mind is not ours. They don’t belong to us. This body is just an instrument for us to be here to learn and to go back to our real essence – which is indestructible, undecay and eternal.

Go beyond our mind and the ego. Go beyond the dualities that we perceive through our senses.

Identify ourselves with this true Self now. We will have no more fears and worries. We will be free from all the turbulences of feelings and emotions, all the ups and downs in life, good and bad experiences in life.

At the end, it’s all just like a movie or a very long dream that we have, which gives us some experiences of fears, pain, excitements, enjoyments, happiness and unhappiness.

May we all be free.

Asana Practice I

Asana practice – part one

Most of the yoga classes that we see nowadays are solely about asana practice. Though it is not the main practice in Yoga, it does play an important role in the aim of achieving positive qualities in order to help us on the path towards self realization.

If we practice yoga asana correctly and regularly with right effort and right intention we will have a strong and flexible body for us to be able to sit for meditation comfortably (although the highest meditation is every moment in life while we are walking, sitting, lying, eating and etc, but sitting meditation is the most important meditation pose that will lead us into the state of Samadhi – complete silence state without name and form). We also will have stronger endurance to perform selfless service and other tasks in daily life. The overall quality of life will be improved. It can also train our will power to become stronger and to go beyond the mind and the body so that we can have firm determination to overcome the negative and impure thoughts that arise in the mind and have self control over our speech and actions.

Asana practice can help us to develop patience, courage, positive thinking, cheerfulness, openness, confidence, perseverance, awareness, detachment, equanimity, will power, self control, calmness, concentration, acceptance, correct understanding, selflessness, humility, compassion, wisdom and being at the present moment. All these qualities are to help us to overcome all the impurities like anger, hatred, jealousy, greed, arrogance, depression, egoism and all types of ignorance that contribute to the unhappiness in us.

It is not the people or the happenings out there that cause us unhappiness. It is the ignorance in us that make us think that it is the surrounding that upset us but actually it is our egoistic, anger, hatred, greed, jealousy, depression, arrogance and etc that is making us so unhappy about everything.

If we have correct understanding and wisdom we will not have unhappiness. It is only when we don’t have correct understanding and wisdom that we will have unhappiness, frustration, disappointment and depression.

If we need something to make us happy or feel good about ourselves, we will be very disappointed and unhappy. We are happy and don’t need anything to feel good about ourselves is because we are full and content. We are what we are and are being true. We are not this, we are not that. We are not this fragile body. We are not these emotional feelings. We are not this discontented mind. We are not this selfish ego. We are not this limited intellect.

By training the physical body, we are training the mind as well. If we learn to withstand discomfort and difficulty in physical training, we can develop stronger mental endurance to withstand discomfort situations and overcome difficult moments in life.

We will become more patience, forgiving, accepting, loving, tolerance and open minded. We learn to respect other people who have different thinking, different cultures, different beliefs and different views from us.

We also learn to stop judging, comparing, competing and criticizing. We learn to let go expectations and rewards – the fruit of action or the benefits from the asana practice. We learn to detach from our body and the mind and not identifying with them. We learn to observe the thoughts and feelings without associating with them. We learn how to thin out our ego and minimize our cravings and aversions.

We learn to become humble but full of confidence. We learn not to be driven by praise and compliment. We also learn not to be disturbed by criticism and censure.

Above all, we learn how to overcome fears and negativities in us.

Ultimately we are preparing ourselves to go beyond the mind and the body, and beyond all the dualities and names and forms.

Yoga practice is about controlling the mind, to have self control over our thoughts, speech and actions, and to go beyond the body and the mind. Asana practice is just one of the tools to help us to conquer the body and the mind. It helps us to develop many divine qualities and to achieve a calm mind which will lead us to self-healing, purification, concentration and followed by clearer understanding. Eventually our well-trained and well-controlled body and mind will lead us to self realization.

Yoga asana is like Pranayama – control of the breath, is a purification process for the energy fields in our body. It purifies and energizes the Nadis – energy channels, and it will unlock and release accumulated tensions – physically, mentally and emotionally. It also stimulates the chakras – energy centres in our body. All these energy centres are related to the body systems – the brain and the nervous system, the digestive system, the elimination system, the reproductive system, the glands and hormone system, the circulatory system and also related to the higher consciousness. It generates fresh energy and channels it for highest purpose – eventually it will help us in controlling the sexual energy and turn it into a divine energy. The greatest obstacle for many people in the path towards self realization is the uncontrolled passionate sexual desire.

Asana practice also helps us to conserve energy in our body instead of exhaust the energy. Although we need to use some energy for us to perform the poses in asana practice but it is only a little amount of energy being consumed when we come to a stage where the poses are being performed almost effortlessly. And by having enough rest in between each asana pose, as well as the long relaxation at the end is actually bringing back lots of fresh energy into the system. All the poses are actually generating energy into the system more than exhausting energy from the system. This doesn’t mean that the energy will become too much and overflows. Our body will know how to balance up the energy and store the excess energy in the “battery” – the solar plexus for later use, and it will channel the energy for a beneficial purpose for self evolution.

Many people find that they are always feeling tired and exhausted even though they have enough sleep and rest, enough food intakes, and doing some exercises for health and fitness reason. It’s because all these activities actually exhaust more energy from their system than to generate energy into the system. They don’t have enough Prana through out the system even though they have been eating a lot of food (the system need to use up lots of energy to digest all these food especially if the food is not pure – meat products, processed food, full of preservatives, colourings, and other chemical stuffs. The energy level being low is also because of the energy centres and energy channels in the body do not function properly – they are blocked and inactive.

No doubt that the physical body is a very important instrument for us to walk the path towards self realization, but the strength and flexibility of the physical body is not the essential mean for self realization. Instead the inner strength (courage, confidence, cheerfulness, perseverance and will power) and inner flexibility (acceptance, adjustment, accommodation, tolerance and forgive) are the means for us to attain self realization.

Even a person without the ability to move, to sit up, to speak, or without hands and feet still can achieve self realization without the need of any asana practice. Self realization is not limited by physical limitation – such as difficulty in sight, hearing, speech or mobility. It is all in the mind. Ignorance exists in the mind, and also dissolves in the mind.

Where is the mind? It is everywhere, inside us and outside us. When we are looking at something, the mind is out there on that object and we are not aware of what is happening inside us. When we are hearing some music, the mind is on that music. When we are observing the breath, the mind is within us on the breath. It is always very busy with the functions of the senses and the objects of the senses. Even when we are asleep, the mind is still busy constructing the dreams. Unless we went into deep sleep, then the mind is resting.

But the subconscious mind is always working. It is receiving input all the time even while we are in deep sleep or being unconscious – like being in coma, or when we are not aware of what is happening within our body and in the surrounding. The whole autonomous body system in our body functions even without us being aware of it. They are receiving inputs and sending outputs all the time without us controlling it or realizing it. The energy field in our body is constantly being affected by the energy from the surrounding every moment. All the energies are having some sorts of exchange or resistance against each other all the time without us knowing about it.

By doing proper asana and Pranayama practice will help us to have some control over the energy and redirect these energy into good use.

Asana Practice II

Asana practice – part 2

Merely performing a headstand or balancing on one foot without the correct understanding will not help us to remove ignorance or to attain self realization. It is just an acrobatic movement only. Maybe we can perform some unusual acrobatic movements but we will still have unhappiness, depression, frustration, discontentment, anger, hatred, jealousy and greed if we don’t have correct understanding. And all these impurities are derived from ignorance.

Practicing yoga asana without the correct understanding is nothing wrong or bad. It will still give us some benefits such as giving us a stronger and more flexible body just like doing any other physical training. It also gives us a boost of courage, confidence and some sorts of good feeling. It will also help us to have a stronger immune system and can help to prevent many physical ailments.

But most important is that if we practice yoga asana with correct understanding, it can help us to remove ignorance as well which is the main reason why we want to practice yoga in search for enlightenment in order to attain true and lasting happiness.

Mental tension and physical tension are inter-related. If we can work on releasing physical tensions by doing the stretches in asana poses will help to release mental and emotional tension too. As the same, if we have mental and emotional tension, we will be having physical tension – the body is stiffened and all the systems in our body also get tensed up. We will be having blood pressure problem, digestion problem, breathing difficulty, irregular heartbeat, constipation or diarrhea, genital related problem, skin problem and so on.

That’s why even though some people have good nutrition intakes, enough exercise and enough rest, they still have so many health related problems or feel tired and have low energy all the time, it’s because they are having so much mental and emotional tensions. All these tensions have been accumulated for so long and continue being generated and never been released. Due to these mental and emotional tensions the physical body also tenses up (especially in the joints, shoulders, neck and facial muscles).

Merely by doing some physical stretching without working on the mental and emotional level will not help much in achieving a healthy body and a happy mind. That’s why yoga practice emphasizes on dealing with the mind to help solve all the other problems.

When we practice yoga asana in a relaxed manner, we are actually relaxing the body and the mind while performing some physical movements. After each session of asana practice, it will leave us feeling fresh, calm, relax and full of energy.

Actually the real relaxation and calming effect are not just coming from the last 10 to 20 minutes of final relaxation, but come from the whole complete session of initial relaxation, initial prayers and chanting of Om (purifying the impurities and vibrating the energy centres), breathing exercise or Pranayama before or/and after the asanas, performing a group of asanas with complete balance of warming up exercises, inverted pose, forward bending pose, backward bending pose, twisting, balancing pose, side bending pose and most important having enough rest in between each asana, and a non-rushing final relaxation and  a short sitting contemplation at the end with a closing prayer that being chanted with great gratitude and humility. Prayers are to remind us about the divine qualities such as compassion and wisdom, and to pay respect and gratitude to all our teachers who had passed down this beautiful teaching from ancient time.

Everything (easy or difficult) that we do from the beginning of the session until the end of the session contribute more or less for the calming and relaxing effect of asana practice. They all are equally important for a complete and well-balanced asana practice session.

Even though sometimes we do not have enough time for a full session of practice and just doing a few poses or even just one pose, but if we do it with the right effort and attitude, we will still get the benefit of being calmed, relaxed, refreshed and re-energized.

It is the concentration of “being at the present moment” which frees us from fears and worries, unlock and release the tensions in our body and in our mind, and let us experience peacefulness and lightness after performing a certain asana, it doesn’t matter if it is forward bending or backward bending pose. No doubt that different body position will have different effect on the body and the mind, such like forward bending is soothing and calming while backward bending is energizing and stimulating, but they both render us a beneficial effect of relaxing and refreshing to the body and the mind. And so we can’t say “do more of this” and “do less of that”. All asanas are beneficial to us in different ways as long as we know how to arrange different types of poses into our regular practice so that we will get a well-balanced asana practice. We want to be calmed, fresh and energetic after asana practice, and not being dulled or being overly agitated or feeling exhausted and tired.

In all the asana poses, there is no differentiation of easy or difficult, or being indicated as beginner or advance level. The poses themselves have no standard of easy or difficult. It is our body capable of doing certain poses and incapable of doing certain poses that make us feel and think that the poses are easy or difficult. Even as a so called “beginner” comes for an asana class, or a so called “long-time practitioner” comes into the same class, they will be doing the same asanas and it depends very much on their individual’s strength, flexibility, stamina and mentality that determine how well can the person do the poses or which poses is easier or more difficult than the others. Some people are very flexible in forward bends but inflexible on backward bends while some others are the other way round (imbalanced flexibility). Some people are not flexible in both forward bends and backward bends but are very good at twisting or side bending.

And thus, we cannot have any judgment and comparison at all with anybody.

The new practitioners and the old practitioners are actually practicing the same poses (all poses should not be labeled as beginner’s poses or advance’s poses). And it is not that the one who had been practicing for a longer time will be the more advanced student and should be learning certain poses being indicated as “advanced poses” while the newly practice student is being labeled as a beginner or less advanced student and should be learning only those so called “beginner’s poses”. It is not that those who can do headstand and other complicated poses are more advanced while those who cannot do headstand and other complicated poses are less advanced. Some people can hold all the poses for a very long time but that doesn’t determine that he or she is an advance practitioner also.

It is not that people have been doing asana for a very long time, or can perform many complicated movements that require super flexibility and strength will be labeled as advance practitioner. It is their level of understanding of the philosophy, detachment and concentration that define them as advance practitioner doesn’t matter if they can or cannot perform any so called highly difficult poses.

It depends a lot on individual level of health, stamina, strength, flexibility, physical limitations, personality, and understanding of the philosophy, level of detachment and concentration for what they are able to do and whether they can do it comfortably or not. And all these are not permanent. They are changing all the time. Sometimes the pose that we used to be able to do it easily might be difficult for us now. Sometimes the pose that was difficult for us might be very easy for us now. And this will change on the next moment.

It is not the poses themselves are being easy or difficult. It is the condition of our mind and the body that is feeling easy or difficult to perform the poses at that present moment.

Like some people who have been practicing asana for a long time but due to their physical health problem they cannot perform inverted poses or find it very uncomfortable in certain poses. But this doesn’t mean that those poses are not good and are dangerous.

It is the same that the difficulty level has got nothing to do with our age, our past experiences or our fears. Some older people are more flexible and stronger than some younger people. Some people with physical injuries before still can perform some poses that even healthy and fit people can’t do. Some people can’t do or not want to do certain poses due to great fear of falling down or injuring themselves. But in fact those poses are not difficult or dangerous at all.